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October 7 Banquet Etiquette

Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips. ~Proverbs 27:2


When He noticed how the guests picked the places of honor at the table, He told them this parable: “When someone invites you to a wedding feast, do not take the place of honor, for a person more distinguished than you may have been invited. If so, the host who invited both of you will come to you and say, “Give this man your seat.” Then, humiliated, you will have to take the least important place. But when you are invited, take the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he will say to you, “friend, move up to a better place.” Then you will be honored in the presence of all your fellow guests. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted. ~Luke 14:7-11

Today we are still focused on lessons around food. This time, however, the lessons are focused more on how we relate to others rather than on our ambitions. Today, both Solomon and Jesus are talking about important occasions around food. They are both concerned with the conduct of the commoner who is invited to an important occasion by someone more important, a ruler, or teacher. Both Jesus and Solomon express concern about the attitude of the one attending.

Special occasions, or banquets today, aren’t at all like they were in Solomon or Jesus’ day. Then, there was a long table, at which people reclined, and people really were seated according to rank of importance. Today, we may have a head table, for the speaker of the evening, or the bride and groom, but everyone else is usually on a more level playing field. There may be name cards, but that is for the sake of placing people in groups who will enjoy each other throughout the meal, not because of rank.

The food is usually of a better quality. Often it is catered. Banquets are often used as fund raisers today, as often as to show honor to someone. Remember what I said yesterday about being more agreeable on a full stomach! It’s usually after dinner that the appeal for money is made.

“Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips.” Haman could have benefited from this advice when he attended the two banquets that Esther held to which he was invited. He really thought that he was something as the only guest of the king and queen. He was very full of himself. After all, he was the only, special guest! What could be more praiseworthy than that! He didn’t need anyone else’s praise.

But it turned out not to be such a great honor for him in the end. Before the banquet was over, he would be moved to the lowest seat, so to speak, and oh my, what a fall it was. Notice that Ester waited to make her appeal until after two days of feasting when the King was probably very full and eager to please. Timing is everything. Ester made her move very carefully to her advantage when the time was right. She had used the food to gain attention, but it was only a tool for another purpose.

It was similar in Jesus’ day. The leadership and the wealthy used their meals, (banquets), as an opportunity to show off. They invited Jesus and His disciples, but not necessarily because they enjoyed Jesus company. It was an opportunity to show off who was important, by ranking the seating, along with showing off their lavish means of entertainment.

Jesus may have been the entertainment for the evening, not as a speaker, but as an opportunity for those in the “know,” to have a little sport with Him at His expense. Jesus would know all this, but to set the example for His followers, He shared His wisdom anyway. “When someone invites you to a wedding feast, do not take the place of honor, for a person more distinguished than you may have been invited. If so, the host who invited both of you will come to you and say, “Give this man your seat.” Then, humiliated, you will have to take the least important place. But when you are invited, take the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he will say to you, “friend, move up to a better place.” Then you will be honored in the presence of all your fellow guests.”

His disciples would come to know that He was practicing what He was preaching. Here, among men, who thought they were something, sat their Creator, probably at one of the lower positions at the table, enduring their jabs and condescending tones. One day, however, He would be seated at the right hand of God, for all, including the others around that table to see. Even they would bow the knee and confess Jesus as Lord. (Phil. 2:8-11)

Jesus was simply instructing His disciples to imitate Him. The truth would come out in the end. “Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.” (Matthew 5:10-12)

Jesus was not treated well as He walked this earth. We can expect similar. When we can remember, however, who we are because of Him, we can endure. Another banquet is coming: The greatest awards banquet of all time. There, we will receive our proper place at the table for all to see. “Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips.” We may have to wait for the God of the universe to recognize and acknowledge our contributions at that time.

Think about it though, isn’t hearing Him say, “well done,” for eternity, worth the struggle to be there at all? We may endure much now, in the seen world, but the seen world is not the one that lasts. In what is now the unseen world, we will have our place for eternity. “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:18) “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him.” (1 Cor. 2:9) Just hang on for that day.

Prayer: Father, Thank you for my invitation to that glorious banquet in the sky! I could not have earned a place at that table. But I do pray that my life lived in gratitude for that honor will also bring You honor and glory. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Song: Well Done




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