May 26 Love is not Easily Angered

A quick tempered person does foolish things, and a crafty person is hated. ~Proverbs 14:17 

A patient person shows great understanding, but a quick tempered person displays folly. ~Proverbs 14:29

A hot tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel. ~Proverbs 17:18

A violent person entices his neighbor and leads him down a path that is not good. ~Proverbs 16:29

A hot tempered man must pay the penalty; if you rescue him, you will have to do it again. ~Proverbs 19:19

An angry man stirs up dissension, and a hot tempered one commits many sins. ~Proverbs 29:22

The violence of the wicked will drag them away, for they refuse to do what is right. The way of the guilty is devious, but the way of the innocent is upright. ~Proverbs 21:7-8

Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, Or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared. ~Proverbs 22:24-25

Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessings, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. ~1 Peter 3:8-9

Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear what they fear; do not be frightened.” But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to anyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. ~1 Peter 3:13-17

Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy, the devil, prowls about like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers and sisters throughout the world are undergoing the same kinds of sufferings. ~1 Peter 5:8-9

My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. ~James 1:19-20

In your anger do not sin; when you are on your bed, search your heart and be silent. ~Psalm 4:4

In your anger do not sin: do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. ~Eph. 4:26

Wow! There’s a lot to chew on here! Talk about repetition. Did you ever realize there are so many Proverbs that warn against anger and the trouble it causes? There’s more than just these eight! The Psalmist also deals with it and Peter dwells on the issue at length. But Paul and James also have to say something about it. I think it’s safe to say that being angry and hot-tempered isn’t a good idea.

What I find interesting is the warning to those who do not struggle with this characteristic, nevertheless, to stay clear of those who do suffer with this affliction. There are many reasons given for this of course. First of all, if a person cannot master themselves, it is probably wise to assume that you won’t be able to control them either.

Secondly, we know, from past proverbs that we have reviewed, that having a hot temper is synonymous with being a fool, and all that comes with that label. They do not think, they react. They destroy rather than build. They add to confusion and create chaos rather than bring about order and peace.

Thirdly, if it is true that we are known by the company we keep, you may be considered a hot-tempered fool as well, just by association. This has an effect on your witness to those around you. “A violent person entices his neighbor and leads him down a path that is not good.” “A hot-tempered man must pay the penalty; if you rescue him, you will have to do it again.” It is better as a friend, to leave the hot-tempered or violent person to suffer the consequences their anger produces, in the hopes that discipline will curb the appetite for harmful anger. We pray that instead there will grow a desire within them to begin to master their emotions.

I think of the child again throwing a temper tantrum. A mature parent knows better than to give in to the demands of a tantrum. It may calm the moment, but also reinforces poor social behavior that will erupt again and again. Many people today have anger triggers that they do not understand. Abuse and abandonment cause deep wounds that go way deeper than the immediate situation. “Hurt people, hurt people.”

Anger can be a means to protect oneself from being hurt further. So it is thought anyway. As with any hurt, habit or hang up that is begun as a successful method of protecting oneself from further pain, anger eventually destroys the one who uses it while hurting those around them in the process. It's like believing that you can tame fire. It begins as a candle flame that chases away the darkness. Then, it grows into a source of warmth to chase away the cold. Then it grows big enough to clear away debris, rotten wood, and clutter.

Then, somehow, it takes over and masters us. “Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.” (James 3:5B-6) That is the course of anger when it is unchecked in the human condition.

Again, in contrast, there is the patient person who takes the time to listen and consider. The sisters Wisdom and Prudence stand beside that one to guide. For they know: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.”

Anger will never make one more righteous. Those who keep company with the angry will not become more righteous either. That’s why it is important to put out our fire before falling to sleep to keep the flame small and manageable. Those whose anger stems from deeper issues need friends who can guide them to find help, but they should not be allowed to let their anger rule the situation.

A good friend learns to say “no,” or lets the angry one walk away so that Christ’s peace can remain in control. Appeasing anger only feeds it. Instead: “Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy, the devil, prowls about like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Think how angry he is in his rebellion against God! Resist him, standing firm in the faith,” Satan will fan the flame of anger when you let him. Surely, anger is the spirit of this age and one of the most dangerous emotions we must deal with as we mature. That's why the Word of God talks about it so much.

In Christ, we are called to: “live in harmony with one another. Be sympathetic. Love as brothers. Be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessings, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” This cannot be accomplished through anger. "Christianity is weakened when Christians fight over who is right." Patience and wisdom, through Christ, must always prevail.

Prayer: Father thank You for Your words of Wisdom. Thank You also for Your Holy Spirit who helps us understand the causes of our anger and helps us get a handle on ourselves. As we believe the gospel and feel how much You love us, though You could be angry about our sin, that makes us want to let go of our anger toward others, and forgive as we have been forgiven. That's the power of the gospel. Thank You Jesus!

Song: The Gift of Love