June 5 De-escalation Training

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. ~Proverbs 15:1 

The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. ~Proverbs 15:2 

The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit. ~Proverbs 15:4 

Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way. Now God had caused the official to show favor and sympathy to Daniel, but the official told Daniel, “I am afraid of my lord, the king, who has assigned your food and drink. Why should he see you looking worse than the other young men your age? The king would have my head because of you!” Daniel then said to the guard whom the chief official had appointed over Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah. “Please test your servants for ten days: give us nothing but vegetables to eat and water to drink. Then compare our appearance with that of the young men who eat the royal food and treat your servants in accordance with what you see.” So, he agreed to this and tested them for ten days. ~1:8-14 

There is a new type of training that is being offered to our police around the country, as they are continually having to deal with more and more volatile situations. It is called de-escalation training. The idea is to avoid allowing the show of force to be the primary means of controlling a situation. Instead, first try to de-escalate the tension before the violence gets started. 

Mob mentality is a hard thing to deal with. Once adrenalin kicks in and the cerebrum disengages, it is very hard to have a rational, peaceful conversation. If you can prevent the adrenalin rush from happening, it is easier to maintain some semblance of control for a safer outcome for all. 

This training has been around for a while in dealing with domestic abuse situations or negotiating in hostage situations. Dealing with a mob is bringing this training to a whole new level. Here are two short videos that show this being done well. 

The first is a visual overview that was recorded in Fayetteville, NC. 

The second is even better, and it happened recently in Flint, MI! 

Think about Daniel again. He was a good Jew. He didn’t want to defile himself by eating all the foods that God had forbidden back in Leviticus 11. He could have been obstinate and simply told his overseer, “I’m not going to eat that stuff!” He could have started a riot with his three friends, or a food fight, or have staged a hunger strike. That’s a popular approach today. 

But what Daniel did, demonstrated real wisdom. His solution worked for everyone’s benefit. First, he presented his dilemma to his overseer. Then, he listened to the predicament he was causing for his overseer. Daniel took this man’s dilemma into consideration. He set about trying to find a way to solve both problems. “The tongue of the wise commends knowledge.” 

It is important to note that, because Daniel approached his overseer in a reasonable manner, the overseer responded in kind. “A soft answer turns away wrath.” There is no expressed anger here on the part of either man. There is negotiation for a solution for the good of all. Daniel suggests a test. It will only last for ten days, meaning that it won’t draw the attention of those over his master, especially King Nebuchadnezzar. 

Then, he invites the overseer to examine him and his three friends and be the final arbiter of the outcome. It sounds as though, if he and his friends look worse, then they might be willing to submit to the rich foods. But God’s diet plan proves to be a winner and we know how things turned out. Daniel trusted in the fact that God’s way is the best way, so he probably knew that it would pass man’s examination. 

Today, a more modern proverb that captures the meaning of our proverbs for today is, “let cooler heads prevail.” Anger can do a lot of damage and harm. Is it any wonder that one of the fruits of the Spirit is, self-control? We can do a lot of harm without thinking when we let our emotions rule the day. It is our harsh words than can stir up anger, fear and raise the defenses of those we are speaking too. 

So much can be gained when we can demonstrate that we hear the opinions and perspectives of our opponent and can assure them that we not only hear, but we are listening. Daniel displayed genuine concern for his overseer. The overseer was willing to work with Daniel because Daniel was trying to be reasonable. 

The spirit is crushed when we feel that we are being lied to or bullied. We don’t need to manipulate or gossip to try to get our way or win people over to our side to win an argument or force our way. It’s not necessary when truth is on our side. Staying under control and keeping our emotions in check are probably two of our biggest challenges as we deal, one human to another. But that is how the soft answer can be delivered, a situation will keep from escalating and the best outcome for all will be discovered.

Think of God as the ultimate de-escalator! He saw everything He wanted for us would be ruined because we brought death into the world. And He had every reason to be very angry with us for our sin. But God used a solution that promotes reconciliation and blesses everyone! Jesus didn’t just take a knee. He took the cross! Then he said walk with me. And He gives life!

Prayer: Thank You Father, for Your soft answer to our hard hearts. Help us to see and employ the wisdom of seeking to serve and walk with, rather than against, those who disagree with us. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Song: Softly and Tenderly