The lamp of the Lord searches the spirit of a person. It searches out its inmost being. ~Proverbs 20:27
Search me, O God, and know my heart. Test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting. ~Psalm 139:23-24
No one lights a lamp and puts it in a jar or puts it under a bed. Instead, he puts it on a stand, so that those who come in can see the light. For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought into the open. Therefore, consider carefully how you listen. Whoever has will be given more; whoever does not have, even what he thinks he has will be taken away. ~Luke 8:16-18
This is the message we have heard from Him and declare to you. God is light. In Him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with Him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, His Son, purifies us from all sin. ~1 John 1:5-7
Isn’t it wonderful that the unseen lamp of our Lord can search out the unseen part of us, our spirit, our inmost being and know even that completely. Since we have already discussed before the idea of God being the true source of light and we, as His followers, continue to spread that light into the darkness of the world, today, I thought it would be good for us to do something different. I want us to do a guided meditation on Psalm 139, a Psalm of Solomon’s Father, David, that can help us to explore the meaning of Solomon’s proverb here, through prayer, better than I can write.
I will be inserting my own thoughts and prayers throughout the Psalm, but I do hope that you will take the time to add your own prayers to the Lord as well. For the sake of flow, I will not be placing reference numbers in the Psalm. But feel free to have your own Bible open to Psalm 139, if you would prefer having those references. My prayer is that you will be blessed with this interactive exercise.
“O Lord, You have searched me and You know me.”
Oh, Lord, Your lamp searches me through and through and knows every intricate part of my being, both the seen and the unseen. Thank you for caring about me so much that You want to know me so completely.
“You know when I sit and when I rise. You perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down. You are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue You know it completely, O Lord.”
You care about everything that I do. You care that I get enough rest. You care that I get up and do my calling. You care about how I speak to others and what I think to myself. You know it all, even when I am choosing to sin. You see it beforehand, and You love me anyway. Please help me to remember to act with Your guidance. Remind me to listen and help me to choose to obey You, most loving, Heavenly Father.
“You hem me in—behind and before. You have laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.”
Thank You for the path You laid out before me before I was even born. You created me for a purpose. You have a map for me to follow. Even if my part is small in the telling of Your story of love, I am not insignificant to You, but a necessary part in the telling. I look forward to understanding it all someday. Thank you for creating me for this moment. I trust in Your guidance because You see the greater picture, the whole story. Please forgive me when I doubt and question. Remember, I am frail and finite, and You are great. I am fearful sometimes and I need to sense Your presence to give me the confidence that I need so that I follow You.
“Where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence? If I go up to the heavens, You are there. If I make my bed in the depths, You are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there Your hand will guide me, Your right hand will hold me fast.”
I can’t lose You and I can’t be lost from You. You are always with me. All I have to do is trust that You are there. You have promised to never leave me, never forsake me and I can trust You in that because You keep Your promises. You are with me when I face difficult challenges. You are with me when I experience joy and You rejoice with me. Thank You for always being with me, always paying attention to me and always caring about me.
“If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to You. The night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to You.”
Sometimes, Lord, I want to hide from You. Sometimes, I want to get away with my sin that I wish You would not see. But “God is light. In Him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with Him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, His Son, purifies us from all sin.” Thank You for not giving me what I want. Thank You for showing me that when I want this, I am actually desiring separation from You, from Jesus, and from my fellow travelers. Thank You for not giving me my way.
“For You created my inmost being. You knit me together in my Mother’s womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful. I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret places. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.”
O Lord, You made me just the way You wanted me. I am just the way You need me to be to fulfill my calling from You. Sometimes, that is so hard to accept. I see how You made others, I see the abilities that You have given others, and, at times, I lament, “Why couldn’t that have been me?” I know that I need to learn to be content with who I am because I have been made as a well-crafted tool for a purpose that You know. When I need your help to accept me as me, please be there for me and help me do that well. Collect the tears that I may cry in that moment and be my comfort. Help me to remember You and receive Your peace. Thank You for Your lamp that searches out the inmost being that You created, that knows and understands my struggles and sees me through them all.
“How precious to me are Your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with You.”
I am so amazed at the amount of thought that You have put into me, that You have put into everyone and everything You have made. Nothing of your creation was done sloppily or as an afterthought. Everything was well planned and thought out. Every other person, every other thing can say the same about You and Your relationship and concern as I am acknowledging this day. Woah! It just blows my mind how much You know and how much You care and how much thought You have put into everything! Amazingly, you keep track of it all!
“If only You would slay the wicked, O God! Away from me you bloodthirsty men. They speak of You with evil intent. Your adversaries misuse Your name. Do I not hate those who hate You, O Lord, and abhor those who rise up against you? I have nothing but hatred for them. I count them my enemies.”
Lord, I probably don’t sound much like a Christian by saying this. In fact, I almost didn’t admit to this part of the Psalm. I don’t understand why You seem to let evil go on so long. I read in Your Word that You hate it too and yet you let it continue. I don’t understand. I long for the day when everyone around me is on the same page. I long for a time when we all live in agreement and harmony. I know that You know who, among the evil, will turn to You. I know that is part of what you are waiting for, but I wish it would hurry up. Then, what if You are still waiting for me to do my part? What if I am a part of the evil continuing because I’m not obeying You, really, either?
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting.”
“For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought into the open. Therefore, consider carefully how you listen. Whoever has will be given more. Whoever does not have, even what he thinks he has will be taken away.”
I am an open book to You, O God. Do with me as You must to reveal Your image in me so that my light, from You, will be bright and revealing. May my light lead the way to You for their blessing. In Jesus name, amen.
Song: Far Too Wonderful
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