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April 30 Practicing the Gift of Presence

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. ~Proverbs 13:12

A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul, but fools detest turning from evil. ~Proverbs 13:19

Like one who takes away a garment on a cold day, or like vinegar poured on soda, Is one who sings songs to a heavy heart. ~Proverbs 25:20

May the God of hope fill you with joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the holy spirit. ~Romans 15:13

We’re starting to read the book series, “The Chronicles of Narnia,” to Maddie as part of the bedtime routine. I hope that you don’t mind another illustration from Narnia, since I think that it describes these proverbs so well. And if you have not yet read these wonderful children’s books by CS Lewis, there is plenty in them to enjoy as an adult, with rich spiritual blessings too.

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” The first thing that comes to mind for me is a picture of the poor inhabitants of Narnia suffering under the White Witch’s reign of terror in which it is “always winter and never Christmas.” Talk about hope deferred! And when Christmas finally came, how life and joy sprang up almost instantly!

In Romans 12:15, Paul instructs us to, “rejoice with those who rejoice,” but he also says, “Mourn with those who mourn.” I think that we all understand that one is easier than the other. Having a longing fulfilled is what we all hope for. We want to see the hopes and dreams of everyone fulfilled. There is such a sense of blessing and, “God loves me,” when things go our way, or perhaps even better!

What is hard is sitting with someone whose prayers are being answered, “wait,” or “no.” Disappointment and grief are a part of suffering that it is hard to watch another endure. It makes us uncomfortable. So, we may try to cheer them up, rushing them at our speed, in truth, to make us more comfortable. But Solomon compares that type of response to: “one who takes away a garment on a cold day, or like vinegar poured on soda, is one who sings songs to a heavy heart.” Vinegar and soda have a pretty strong reaction of turmoil. Taking away a garment that could bring warmth and comfort means that efforts to cheer a heavy heart by singing or smiling while they are crying actually accomplishes the opposite of what you may have been hoping to achieve.

We all know what hope deferred can be. It could involve being overlooked for a promotion, loss of a job. These days I believe that many find the Governor’s extensions of “shelter in place,” orders as an experience of hope deferred. We long to get our lives back to, “normal,” or at least something close to it. Then there is the loss of a loved one. That is a hope deferred until heaven. These are all hard things to bear up under.

When I have done chaplaincy work in the hospital, I am often dealing with people who are in anxious situations in which their hope is deferred. I have found that I don’t need to have answers, or any words at all. I simply bless them as a representative of Christ’s presence in what they are going through; a reminder that He will never leave them nor forsake them.

Often, that is all I can offer, but most of the time, that is enough. It brings a calmness and peace. It’s not a time for me to sing, or answer questions. I don’t try to get them to cheer up or move on or take care of business. I just sit with them, as Jesus would. Often, that’s all others need from us, a representation of Christ’s calming presence. The thing I hear most often is, “Thank you for coming.” Or, “Thank you for being with us.” They don’t need solutions, but they do need His peace. We can do that for those we know who are really struggling with our current situation.

Prayer: Oh, God of all hope, fill me anew and some more with Your joy and peace so that by trusting in You, I may over flow with hope, through the presence of the Holy Spirit, so that I can minister to others who need what I have in Christ. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Song: He is Our Peace

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