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April 23 Crock Pot Friendships?

A righteous person is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray. ~Proverbs 12:26

Do not be misled: bad company corrupts good character. ~1 Cor. 15:33

You have to wonder what Solomon would think of Facebook. Friends are made so easily via that platform. Make a request, a few clicks, and it’s done. You’re in, part of the society of friends. It’s so easy!

But wisdom says, “A righteous person is cautious in friendship.” So, I have a caution to follow a simple security protocol on Facebook. I never accept a friend request without thinking about whether I want to be friends. Then, if I do want to be in contact with that person, I still delete their friend request and then I send one back to them. I also send a message explaining why I do that. That way, I’m pretty sure I avoid scammers and hackers pretending to be my friend.

Even before Facebook, Solomon knew, “A righteous person is cautious in friendship.” Why should that be? Why is it a good thing to be cautious? The righteous are cautious, or prudent, and that is a wise thing. The truth is that friends and family have more influence over our lives than any other force. We need to be careful in whom we place our trust.

We are choosing our influencers, the ones we will listen to more than anything else. They are the ones we will trust most to share our confidences. They may also end up being the ones that we can most influence. It’s much more serious than a simple friend request on Facebook. Who we choose to have as friends has the potential of influencing the direction of our lives. It's a slow process, barely noticeable, like cooking in a crock pot.

The righteous can be led astray by friendships with the wrong people. This is especially important for kings and leaders. People who want power love to pretend to be friends with people who have power. But the wisdom also applies to all of us because we are so easily tempted by “peer pressure.” That’s what Solomon means when he says that “the wicked can lead, “them,” astray. It is the righteous that can still be led astray through friendships. We know that friends can have a big influence over our children as they grow, especially in the teen years when the peer group seems to matter more than parents. Good news, they don’t really. Studies show that no matter what they say, kids are really influenced by their parents and family most.

Paul warns of the same when he says: “Do not be misled: bad company corrupts good character.” In Paul’s case, he is warning the people in the church at Corinth not to be led astray by false doctrines and teachings that they are hearing from those nearby such as discrediting belief in the resurrection. They were being influenced by heretics who were closer in proximity than Paul was. Paul was very concerned about them being led astray. He was concerned that they choose their influencers carefully.

We tend to trust friends for what to buy and what to believe. For a long time, so many products were sold by friends throwing parties for the other friends to get them to see the latest in storage containers, toys and tools. Things that you might pass by in the store can seem more impressive when they are in your friend’s house and your friend has invited you over for food and games and, just a little sales talk.

We can be influenced to tweak our view of the gospel, or reconsider it altogether, through the influence of our friends. We may not realize we’re drifting, kind of like the frog in the pot, but the possibility is there. However, the wisdom we are talking about does not mean break off relationships and insulate from everybody who disagrees with you. The caution means, be aware of the process and its power.

We need to be aware of this so that we leverage its power in favor of God’s ways. In a few earlier devotionals, we have already talked about influencers and influencing. That makes everybody a leader of somebody. We can be the good friends, who influence others in right ways. We don’t have to drift with our friends into relativism or post-modern thinking, we can take the lead in our friendships and be the influencers, guiding our friends into the truth.

If it is true that bad company corrupts, what is the power of good company that we can provide? Friendship isn’t just a passive coexistence. We need to be thoughtful about what our friends bring into our lives and intentional about what we bring into theirs, both for our spiritual health and for the Kingdom.

Prayer: Father God, most faithful friend, I definitely want You to be the biggest influence in my life! Thank You Lord for choosing me to be friends with! And help me Lord to be a good friend who loves to introduce other people to You, because I know You want to meet them. And I know they need to know You. In Jesus' name, amen.

Song: Jesus is All the World to Me

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